Changed seasons

I remember and miss those days when i would leave work at 5.P.M, lock myself in my room and pray and worship till 9 P.M then make myself some tea drink and sleep. I remember other times when i would decide that instead of going home in the evening, i would go to a prayer centre and spend the whole night there. When i would attend all church meetings without worry because time wasn’t an issue. But its no longer that time anymore. Now i barely have an hour for that, and church meeting are only attended when i can. Not because i don’t want to but with all what is on my side, i has become difficult. However, i must learn to accept it and take advantage of the few minutes that i have to seek God. 

I must confess that it wasn’t easy to accept that. Many times i struggled with it and at some point i thought that i was no longer acceptable to God. However when i kept praying and seeking advice from people of higher spiritual authority, i realized that it was ok. God also helped me to realize that there are seasons in life (Eccl 3). Sometimes we are moving fast, other times its slow and other times there is no movement at all. In my worrying, God reminded me of a few people in the bible that went through these seasons. One of them was Joseph the son of Jacob.

From the book of Genesis 37, we learn that Joseph had it all going on great. His father loved him and he had dreams and visions and his life was moving in the right direction. However, one act by his brothers changed everything. While in the cistern and then when he was sold to slavery, his life seemed to be digressing and his dreams might have faded away in his mind. He was taken to work as a slave in a land that he had never thought of. He became a slave working in a home that he had never imagined and at this time his life was stagnant. 

It wasn’t until he was elevated to a farm manager that his life somehow started making sense. However, this was cut short when he was accused of attempted raped and was throw into prison. It must have been a terrible season. Here there was no freedom to do anything, he could not dream, he could do nothing. It was a hopeless situation, and he never saw himself coming out of it. This meant that none of his dreams would be accomplished. The worst thing was that he was sure that he would never see his father again who he loved very much. It was terrible and i must confess that at some point that is how i felt.

My inability to pray and seek God has much as i had done before made me feel like i had lost complete contact with God. I feared that i would fall and that God would not accept me back. see http://veramoses.blogspot.co.ke/2016/01/i-have-prayed-for-you.html. But God has helped me realize that its a season and it will end. And just like how after a long stay in the prison and a dream by a king helped Joseph come out, get a promotion which meant his dreams being fulfilled and later seeing his father again, i will one day wake up from the business of life and season of stagnation and low speed and i will seek the Lord for a whole day without worry of schedules.                                                                          

                                                               

God bless you and keep growing in Him.

Legacy

Let us not become weary in doing good, for at the proper time we will reap a harvest if we do not give up.Therefore, as we have opportunity, let us do good to all people, especially to those who belong to the family of believers.(Gal 6:9-10)

Something happened to me last evening that for a moment i thought i was going to be with the Lord...LOL.To take the thought away,I tried to convince myself that my life wasn’t yet over because I hadn’t yet achieved my vision in life.However, this morning while taking a shower,it dawned on me that when the time to go with the Lord comes, it doesn’t matter whether we have achieved our visions or not but how we have lived our lives.

You see, for the last few weeks, so many of our christian brothers and sisters have left us. I must admit that for a moment I feared that it was rapturing but I had to convince myself that some of the foretold signs had not yet taken place.It is this morning that I was reminded that it doesn’t matter whether it is rapture time or not that I will somehow have to leave this world when my time comes.However, what I should worry about is what legacy I will leave.

Two days ago we buried a dear brother from our church family.This brother wasn’t the wealthiest, the most learned or the even the greatest leader , or the oldest man(he was young in his early thirties) around but I must say that his deeds will live on even after we are gone.He was a man who was there for God and for all of us. Many times I looked up to him in ministry because he was a great example in service to me and many of us.His commitment to serve was great,we loved him in church,he gave his time and resources to everyone.

People spoke of how honest he was in his business dealings,how they came to know the Lord through him,how he taught them about God’s principles and word and how much he prayed for them. However,nobody spoke about how many cars he owned or how much land and buildings he had. All they talked about were his deeds and these will forever remain with them.This helped me realize that its never about material things that we have or the power that we may possess but that what matters the most is what we do for/to others and how it makes them feel.

I don’t know whether if I died today people would say such nice things about me, but I must say that the life of this man challenged me to consider my actions towards others more important than my material goals or even education. I have therefore set my heart to try do nice things to all by the grace of God because after-all, that is what matters most and that is what will forever remain in people’s hearts.I know by the grace of God I will and we all can. Let us therefore  strive to do good because it is what we will be remembered for.

God bless you and keep growing in Him!

Lord change me

Have you ever been in a situation that exposes who you are that you didn't think you were? Something like leaving home in the morning thinking and confident that your are well dressed, not caring to look at yourself in the mirror to determine how you are, then later in the day when you meet a mirror along some corridor you realize that you mismatched something? I know we have such moments and this has happened to me for the last two months i have been married. Marriage has been that mirror for me.

Its not that i wasn’t a christian when i got in it. I was and i still i’m, seeking God everyday and serving Him the best i can. However, so much about my character has been exposed that sometimes i don’t believe myself. I have come to realize that i haven't been as kind or as selfless or as patient as i thought i was. Sometimes it has brought me to tears when i go through these moments but i thank God because in these moments God has come to my rescue. He has taught me many things and my character has been changing. Actually, just the other day i was advising a friend that if he really wanted to know who he is, he should get married because i have learnt that alot about us is revealed.

I can say that God has been sufficient in these moments of being exposed.In these moments, i have cried to God to change me because i need to be a better me, what He expects me to be. In this season, i have been praying for this change and God has come along to help me. He has helped me to realize that He is like a refiner’s fire or like a launderer's soap and He can transform me, refine me like gold and silver (Mal 3:2-4) and thus my offering, my service to Him and in my marriage can be offered in righteousness.

I love how He goes on to tell me that He will not be silent until my righteousness shines like dawn and my salvation like a blazing torch (Isaiah 62:1). This means that He is ready to mold me like clay to bring me into that shape that He considers best for me.  I am ready and i surrender. It may not be easy, i might have to go through fire but His grace is sufficient for me and i belong to Him. He will therefore not let me go through what i can’t handle and He will be there watching that i just get refined well enough not to waste me but to make me better.

So marriage has been my mirror and i thank God for it. It might have been intended for the earthly matters but i thank God because it will help me achieve the heavenly requirements. Therefore i believe that marriage is not just for us but also for the glory of God. So Lord change me through my marriage and align me to your will.

God bless you and keep growing in Him.

Look at the bright side

Life can be painful sometimes,kinda like a thorn in the flesh like paul calls it in 2Corinthians 12:7-10. Because of this, we can spend all our lives like paul begging God to take these thorns away. Some many times however,these thorns may never depart from our lives or may persist for so long. However, we must learn not to dwell on the thorns, but should ask God to help us see the brighter side of it, a part of the situation that can be working for our good.

When I talk about this, I have in mind a married woman who has been praying and trusting God for a child for so long without success. Another man or lady who has been praying and trusting God for a spouse and is now so old but the spouse is not forthcoming. A person who has been married to a violent or sinful spouse and has been praying for them to change without success. A sick person who seems to be accumulating hospital bills without cure for their illness. A schooled person who has been looking for a job for a long time without success and so many more issues. Some times it may not make sense to concentrate on the positive side but their is one. Their is always a dark and a bright side of every situation.

Think about the stroy of Stephen’s stoning, Paul’s thorn or even Jesus’ crucification and suffering. In all these, they chose to see the brighter side of their situations.Stephen when he was being stoned in Acts 7 chose to look towards heaven and he saw the glory of God and Jesus standing on the right hand of God. What a sight! When Paul prayed three times for the thorn to be taken away but without success, God promised him that God’s grace would be sufficient for him and that His power would be made perfect in his weakness. What an assurance! And Jesus when He begged God to remove the cup of suffering without success and He went through it, he received the glory and became our Lord. What an honor!

So it may really not matter so much what we may be going through at the moment, what matters is the end result. Your lack of a job can be an opportunity for you to start a multi billion business. Your continued praying for your spouse could be an opportunity for you to get deeper in God and for Him to use you to do exploits. You delayed spouse could be an opportunity to serve God and yourself which can be a challenge once you are married because of change in priorities .And your illness and lack of a child could later turn to be a great testimony and a source of encouragement to some many resulting to greatness and fame.

Remember an expectant/pregnant mother who has to go through 9 terrible months of pain and discomfort plus the last days painful labor before birth. She chooses to go through it all because her eyes are fixed on the bundle of joy that will come forth after all the suffering. Therefore, we must choose to look on that bright side. We must pray to God to help us see it and I promise you that His grace is sufficient for us (2 Corinthians 12:9-10) for when we are weak, then we are strong.

God bless you and keep growing in Him!

The uncultivated land

 I had selfishly prayed and fasted so much for God to give me what i thought i needed. For three years, i prayed and tried to do it my way, trying to ask it in his name, but never giving a chance to his will. Although i had it all planned out in me, i could feel a deep longing in me that i knew my desires would not satisfy. So for those three years, i had prayed, looked and moved from place to place without satisfaction. 

I decided to quit moving and looking and settled down to receiving everything from my dad. You see, him being so kind and caring, he was able and willing to give me all the material things i needed. I remember he would give me upkeep, pay my rent, give me money for small businesses when i thought i needed one and even sometimes send me money when i hadn’t asked for it. However, this did not satisfy me. Instead everyday i was drowning in the sea of stress and self pity and getting skinny every day because all that could not satisfy me.

It wasn’t until i chose to surrender to God’s will that things changed. God slowly opened my eyes and i could see clearly. He gave me promises of where he would take me and then took me through a period of training and preparedness. He clearly showed me that what was ahead of me wasn’t anything i had ever been in or to before and i had to let Him equip me for it. Slowly he aligned me to His will and when i was ready he took me there.

I can’t begin to explain to you the calmness and satisfaction that i felt when i got there-its indescribable-, but i can testify to you that nothing had ever felt like it before. I loved it. The peace in my heart and the love and favor i received from every body i met in that new place, a place i hadn’t been before with people i had never met before. All this reminded me of the story of Abraham in Genesis 14.

The bible talks of how Lot together with the king of Sodom and other kings had been captured. When Abraham heard about it, he went with his men to rescue them, which he succeed. When they came back, the king of Sodom wanted to give Abraham wealth but Abraham refused. He wasn’t ready to let anyone take credit for him being wealthy but all he wanted was the wealth that God would give him just as God had promised. I got a revelation that sometimes God takes us to ‘uncultivated land’, the kind that looks unproductive so that he can grow us from there and help us cultivate it and thus make us great so that when nations bow before us and call us blessed, no one will take credit for it but all the glory will be unto Him.

God bless you and keep growing in Him!